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05/06/2010 01:22:45 PM · #226
Originally posted by redjulep:

What's the sound of one hand clapping?

That's a myth dispelled by Bart Simpson.
05/06/2010 01:45:05 PM · #227
The sun was up so high when I waked that I judged it was after eight o'clock. I laid there in the grass and the cool shade thinking about things, and feeling rested and ruther comfortable and satisfied. I could see the sun out at one or two holes, but mostly it was big trees all about, and gloomy in there amongst them. There was freckled places on the ground where the light sifted down through the leaves, and the freckled places swapped about a little, showing there was a little breeze up there. A couple of squirrels set on a limb and jabbered at me very friendly.

I was powerful lazy and comfortable—didn't want to get up and cook breakfast. Well, I was dozing off again when I thinks I hears a deep sound of "boom!" away up the river. I rouses up, and rests on my elbow and listens; pretty soon I hears it again. I hopped up, and went and looked out at a hole in the leaves, and I see a bunch of smoke laying on the water a long ways up—about abreast the ferry. And there was the ferryboat full of people floating along down. I knowed what was the matter now. "Boom!" I see the white smoke squirt out of the ferryboat's side. You see, they was firing cannon over the water, trying to make my carcass come to the top.

I was pretty hungry, but it warn't going to do for me to start a fire, because they might see the smoke. So I set there and watched the cannon-smoke and listened to the boom. The river was a mile wide there, and it always looks pretty on a summer morning—so I was having a good enough time seeing them hunt for my remainders if I only had a bite to eat. Well, then I happened to think how they always put quicksilver in loaves of bread and float them off, because they always go right to the drownded carcass and stop there. So, says I, I'll keep a lookout, and if any of them's floating around after me I'll give them a show. I changed to the Illinois edge of the island to see what luck I could have, and I warn't disappointed. A big double loaf come along, and I most got it with a long stick, but my foot slipped and she floated out further. Of course I was where the current set in the closest to the shore—I knowed enough for that. But by and by along comes another one, and this time I won. I took out the plug and shook out the little dab of quicksilver, and set my teeth in. It was "baker's bread"—what the quality eat; none of your low-down corn-pone.

I got a good place amongst the leaves, and set there on a log, munching the bread and watching the ferry-boat, and very well satisfied. And then something struck me. I says, now I reckon the widow or the parson or somebody prayed that this bread would find me, and here it has gone and done it. So there ain't no doubt but there is something in that thing—that is, there's something in it when a body like the widow or the parson prays, but it don't work for me, and I reckon it don't work for only just the right kind.
05/06/2010 02:04:32 PM · #228
Citadel is trying to wear us down by posting a tome.

05/06/2010 02:14:32 PM · #229
"It's better to be unhappy alone than unhappy with someone."

Marilyn Monroe
05/06/2010 02:15:52 PM · #230
Originally posted by redjulep:

Citadel is trying to wear us down by posting a tome.


What? You don't like Huck Finn? :)
05/06/2010 06:29:18 PM · #231
YAY! Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no weevil.
05/06/2010 06:37:01 PM · #232
i lay in my bed last night looking up at the night sky, thinking where the hell is my celing
05/06/2010 06:39:26 PM · #233
ceiling. it's c-e-i-l-i-n-g.
05/07/2010 12:02:51 AM · #234
Here’s to alcohol, the cause of — and solution to — all life’s problems.
05/07/2010 01:33:36 AM · #235
The sky is falling! Quick, lock this thread!
05/07/2010 02:05:28 AM · #236
05/07/2010 03:03:36 AM · #237
05/07/2010 03:06:16 AM · #238
Originally posted by Art Roflmao:

ceiling. it's c-e-i-l-i-n-g.


shhh
05/07/2010 03:06:49 AM · #239
iiiit.
05/07/2010 04:31:16 AM · #240



NOPE!
05/07/2010 05:13:38 AM · #241
... last time I saw the boll weevil, he was studying to fly 747s ...
05/07/2010 12:36:36 PM · #242
Oooohhh - that wascally wabbit!
05/07/2010 01:17:30 PM · #243
I want to play!!!! (but not, The Game)
05/07/2010 01:30:24 PM · #244
05/07/2010 02:19:59 PM · #245
"Everyone is trying to accomplish something big, not realizing that life is made up of little things."

05/07/2010 02:22:34 PM · #246
"All big things in this world are done by people who are
naive and have an idea that is obviously impossible."
05/07/2010 02:30:30 PM · #247
Originally posted by Art Roflmao:

"All big things in this world are done by people who are
naive and have an idea that is obviously impossible."

TrollMan likes this.
05/07/2010 02:34:41 PM · #248
Originally posted by TrollMan:

TrollMan likes this.

Art likes that TrollMan likes this.
05/07/2010 03:20:26 PM · #249
I know that you believe that you understood what you think I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant. :)
05/07/2010 03:38:28 PM · #250
Oh yes, absolutely, well put.
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