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02/05/2009 01:41:31 PM · #1
Hi. Is it against the rules to mention in a photo comment that you received a private message from the photographer resulting in a revisit to the pic and further commenting? A user did not like my comment, pm'd me, I responded via pm, received another pm from him, and revisted the pic. I left an additional comment,referencing the pm's and he has now sent me a pm calling me unethical and threatening to publicly excoriate me (his word) if I do not remove my comment. This is the second ugly exchange that I have had on this site in the past week over comments that I left that I thought were carefully-worded and addressing only the photograph, but honest. Is it a farce that photographers want constructive criticism on here? I am actually a kind and gentle person, but I believe that constructive criticism is intended to be truthful or it is not constructive. What am I doing wrong here?
02/05/2009 01:49:51 PM · #2
I don't think you are doing anything wrong. You just got a couple of duds that cant take the constructive criticism. the chance of you getting that again twice in one week is almost none. It happens to all of us at one point or another.
02/05/2009 01:50:01 PM · #3
Hi, Teran. Sorry to hear that you've had a bad experience. Your best bet would be to open a ticket with site council by going to the Help->Contact Us menu and asking them to look into it. I hope that this won't discourage you from continuing to participate.
02/05/2009 01:52:54 PM · #4
It's best to learn early not to respond to PMs from people about your comments at all.

If you open it up and it's a tirade against your comment, just delete it and never worry about it again ;D
02/05/2009 01:52:55 PM · #5
is it against the rules? not that I know of. IMO, I think the offense started with the original PM asking you to revisit the pic. while not against the rules, it is generally thought to be in poor taste to do that. but that is certainly a personal decision, and everyone might feel a little differently about that. While often tempted to do so, I refrain from sending any PM to a commenter for a number of reasons, unless I specifically state that I do not wish the commenter to change a vote. this is a line I have set for myself.

as with any on-line community, you will encounter all kinds of folks, from the big-hearted to the downright mean. I say, keep on making the constructive comments, being aware that you might occasionally experience a negative response. In general, the vast majority of folks here want those constructive criticisms and actually appreciate them.
02/05/2009 02:05:21 PM · #6
I would leave both comments exactly as is. Clearly the person is trying to get you to change things during the voting period, when the comments are not viewable. Once the challenge is over, both comments will be viewable, and it will be easy for people to see that s/he complained about a comment--they want to hide that fact. Keep the comments as is. Maybe next time the person will hesitate before spewing in a PM.

Submitting a ticket for abuse via PMs is also appropriate.

I believe there is also an option on your profile/preferences to keep your identity anonymous on comments left during voting so these few individuals cannot hassle you during voting.

I would also not respond to any more PMs from this person, but report any of them that trouble you to the SC.
02/05/2009 02:11:50 PM · #7
You could be a bag-head and that way no one knows who you are, until after voting.
02/05/2009 03:43:23 PM · #8
I have suggested many times that the site should be set up so that everyone is a bag head during voting. Most of the bitchy pm's sent about comments happen in the heat of the moment, during voting. Since it is against the rules and unethical to ask someone to change their vote by explaining your entry to someone that has commented...what is the point of not having everyone be a baghead? It would help get rid of some of the nasty pm's that cause folks to get negative about leaving comments (and we all want more comments) without changing any rules....
02/05/2009 05:10:35 PM · #9
I have received PM's related to comments I have left before. I generally will respond to the PM via PM with additional insight IF the PM is written in a nice and explaining way. In this PM, I usually tell them also that I will not change my original comment or vote. If the person has PM'd and asked for additioanl information nicely, then i know that they are going to read it, rather than ignore it like others do.

If someone sends me a nasty PM, or tries to get me to change my vote/comment (rarely happens), I either deleate the PM, or respond back telling them that I do not alter votes or comments in response to PM's.

Leave the Votes and Comments as they are. If the PM's are bad, raise it with SC. Keep Voting and Commenting as a couple of people should not destroy the fun and learning you can get from this site.

02/05/2009 05:29:24 PM · #10
teran, I don't even like it when someone sends me a PM thanking me for my positive comment (if voting is still going on). If someone sends me a PM saying I'm wrong about their processing steps, I understand the impulse, but it probably won't influence my voting, unless they are really nasty, in which case I'll probably lower my vote. I'm only human. :-)

One of my first contacts here was with someone who sent me a PM objecting to my comment. I responded tactfully instead of angrily and then he felt sheepish and that was the end of that, except now I consider him an online friend of sorts, and hopefully vice-versa.

02/05/2009 05:36:54 PM · #11
I think it's very poor taste on the part of the photographer to PM someone during voting ... I agree with Larry that I don't like it even if it's a "thank you" to a comment I've made ... I've received many PM's by people during voting and MOST of the time I just delete them ... once in a while I'll respond.
02/05/2009 05:42:12 PM · #12
Originally posted by teranb:

Hi. Is it against the rules to mention in a photo comment that you received a private message from the photographer resulting in a revisit to the pic and further commenting? A user did not like my comment, pm'd me, I responded via pm, received another pm from him, and revisted the pic. I left an additional comment,referencing the pm's and he has now sent me a pm calling me unethical and threatening to publicly excoriate me (his word) if I do not remove my comment. This is the second ugly exchange that I have had on this site in the past week over comments that I left that I thought were carefully-worded and addressing only the photograph, but honest. Is it a farce that photographers want constructive criticism on here? I am actually a kind and gentle person, but I believe that constructive criticism is intended to be truthful or it is not constructive. What am I doing wrong here?


Teranb, please forward a ticket detailing your exchange and we'll look into it. No one should be requesting that you change your vote in response to a comment that you made.
02/05/2009 06:02:17 PM · #13
Thanks, everyone, for your support and advice. I have submitted a message to the Site Council with the messages attached and I left the comments as is. I hope this is over now.

Message edited by L2 - Locking thread -- SC is working to resolve the matter privately..
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