Since you asked for a critique, here it is:
I wouldn't call this a portrait, more of a candid snapshot. Having sunglasses perched on top of your head is not a deliberate "portrait" thing to do.
Another non-portrait indicator are the distractions in the background, especially the thing growing out of her head - that is very much a No-NO!
I love her smile! Pretty girl, sweet smile, nice angle.
I wish the focus on the eyes was sharper. It seems that when it comes to people, as long as the eyes are in perfect focus, the rest can look good, no matter what.
In this case, the focus point was on her hair (lower left).
I'm no expert on b&W conversions, but this one looks "blah" even to me! It needs more range, more contrast, more something.
There are gazillions of tutorials available on the internet, have a cruise around, I'm sure you'll find lots of great tips on how to take good portraits.
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