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DPChallenge Forums >> Rant >> Open letter to those who on the same floor as I
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06/06/2006 01:49:31 PM · #1
Dear office residents of the 8th floor:

If you use the washroom and I happen to be in there at the same time, I am not fooled into believing you have washed your hands by simply running them under some water. It's quite abvious you have not bothered to use any soap from the dispenser, as it makes a clearly audible, and distinctly recognisable sound.

Why do you bother to carry on this charade? It's not so bad if you were simply taking a whizz, but you were obviously taking a dump.

Now I'm forced to use a paper towel to turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.

There are only three small companies on this floor of the building, and I notice that the people in the PENSION company are frequent hygene offenders. Now, if I am ever introduced to anybody in the 'pension' industry at a social gathering, I will not shake their hand.
06/06/2006 01:50:44 PM · #2
eeeeewwwwww......
06/06/2006 01:51:19 PM · #3
Can you make them a gift basket of hand soap or something?
06/06/2006 02:03:46 PM · #4
Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?
06/06/2006 02:08:03 PM · #5
Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


Originally posted by Strikeslip:

..It's not so bad if you were simply taking a whizz, but you were obviously taking a dump.

06/06/2006 02:11:25 PM · #6
Originally posted by Strikeslip:

Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


Originally posted by Strikeslip:

..It's not so bad if you were simply taking a whizz, but you were obviously taking a dump.

*Checks Prof_Fate's profile & finds he works in a Pension Systems Solutions company...*

Message edited by author 2006-06-06 14:11:41.
06/06/2006 02:14:24 PM · #7
Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


And technically, you are clean when you get out of the shower so why should you ever have to wash your towels :)
06/06/2006 02:20:14 PM · #8
Originally posted by LoudDog:

Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


And technically, you are clean when you get out of the shower so why should you ever have to wash your towels :)


'cuz they rub dead skin off you and it ROTS, dude... jejeje™

R.
06/06/2006 02:44:55 PM · #9
Originally posted by Bear_Music:


'cuz they rub dead skin off you and it ROTS, dude... jejeje™

R.


Well, there goes lunch :)

06/06/2006 03:04:18 PM · #10
Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


One word: splashback
06/06/2006 03:47:38 PM · #11
Originally posted by Spazmo99:

Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


One word: splashback


Not to mention you've had it stuffed down into the warmest sweatiest area of your body all day
06/06/2006 03:55:34 PM · #12
Originally posted by Spazmo99:

Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


One word: splashback


Not a problem a footlong. But not all men know that.
06/06/2006 03:57:25 PM · #13
Originally posted by Strikeslip:

Now, if I am ever introduced to anybody in the 'pension' industry at a social gathering, I will not shake their hand.


Better extend that to DPC GTG.
06/06/2006 04:00:40 PM · #14
Originally posted by ShutterPug:

Originally posted by Spazmo99:

Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


One word: splashback


Not to mention you've had it stuffed down into the warmest sweatiest area of your body all day


He sticks it under his armpit???????? WOW
06/06/2006 04:07:11 PM · #15
Originally posted by RayEthier:

Originally posted by ShutterPug:

Originally posted by Spazmo99:

Originally posted by Prof_Fate:

Not sure about you, but I wash my weener when I shower and I don't piss on my hands .... so what's to clean?


One word: splashback


Not to mention you've had it stuffed down into the warmest sweatiest area of your body all day


He sticks it under his armpit???????? WOW


sorry Ray - but with men the crotch area is warmer
06/06/2006 04:09:09 PM · #16
Originally posted by ShutterPug:


He sticks it under his armpit???????? WOW


sorry Ray - but with men the crotch area is warmer [/quote]

... and to think that all this time I warmed up my hands in the winter time by sticking them in my armpits.....oh well, live and learn.

Ray
06/06/2006 04:09:40 PM · #17
I've just returned from the can and was reflecting on this thread and reminiscing about my youth.

My little brother, a few years my junior, had the misfortune of having me as his big brother. He was at that trusting age, ripe for my abuse during bed-time teeth-brushing rituals. I filled his water cup with urine one evening, and told him it was warm apple juice. Oh how I laughed when he took a mouthful!

He was small enough that he had to use the toilet seat to climb up to the sink to brush his teeth. One time I ran an experiment. I left the toilet seat & lid up after he'd mounted the sink's countertop. He didn't look before he got down, so he got a good soaker. I got in trouble for that one, but it was worth it.

To this day, he remembers the lid incident, but has wiped the warm applejuice incident from memory.
06/06/2006 04:16:22 PM · #18
OOOHH Slip! That's off the hook!

Originally posted by Strikeslip:

I've just returned from the can and was reflecting on this thread and reminiscing about my youth.

My little brother, a few years my junior, had the misfortune of having me as his big brother. He was at that trusting age, ripe for my abuse during bed-time teeth-brushing rituals. I filled his water cup with urine one evening, and told him it was warm apple juice. Oh how I laughed when he took a mouthful!

He was small enough that he had to use the toilet seat to climb up to the sink to brush his teeth. One time I ran an experiment. I left the toilet seat & lid up after he'd mounted the sink's countertop. He didn't look before he got down, so he got a good soaker. I got in trouble for that one, but it was worth it.

To this day, he remembers the lid incident, but has wiped the warm applejuice incident from memory.

06/06/2006 05:06:48 PM · #19
Originally posted by RayEthier:

Originally posted by ShutterPug:


Not to mention you've had it stuffed down into the warmest sweatiest area of your body all day


He sticks it under his armpit???????? WOW


ROFL. My son thinks i've lost it, given the absolute giggling fit i had over this. :)
06/06/2006 06:11:20 PM · #20
Originally posted by Strikeslip:

... taking a dump.

A physician I know was compiling a list of phrases and euphemisms for this particular bodily function ... as I recall it was well over two hundred items, but that was about twenty years ago ...
06/06/2006 07:11:50 PM · #21
Originally posted by Strikeslip:

I've just returned from the can and was reflecting on this thread and reminiscing about my youth.

My little brother, a few years my junior, had the misfortune of having me as his big brother. He was at that trusting age, ripe for my abuse during bed-time teeth-brushing rituals. I filled his water cup with urine one evening, and told him it was warm apple juice. Oh how I laughed when he took a mouthful!

He was small enough that he had to use the toilet seat to climb up to the sink to brush his teeth. One time I ran an experiment. I left the toilet seat & lid up after he'd mounted the sink's countertop. He didn't look before he got down, so he got a good soaker. I got in trouble for that one, but it was worth it.

To this day, he remembers the lid incident, but has wiped the warm applejuice incident from memory.


I hope you're paying for his therapy session! :P
06/06/2006 07:23:08 PM · #22
And I bet you've been paranoid about your trousers ever since the first time you used a urinal whilst wearing shorts, huh?
06/08/2006 10:22:43 PM · #23
a marine and a sailor were in the john at the same time, taking a whiz. when they finished, the marine headed towards the door, without washing his hands. the sailor piped up, "in the navy, we learned to wash our hands after urinating." to which the marine replied, "in the marines, we learned not to piss on our hands..."
06/08/2006 10:33:20 PM · #24
I can't believe I read this whole thread. ...twice.

Originally posted by GeneralE:

Originally posted by Strikeslip:

... taking a dump.

A physician I know was compiling a list of phrases and euphemisms for this particular bodily function ... as I recall it was well over two hundred items, but that was about twenty years ago ...

Where's your limerick??
06/08/2006 10:34:36 PM · #25
Originally posted by Strikeslip:

My little brother, a few years my junior, had the misfortune of having me as his big brother...

I think my little and your little brother are in the same therapy group.
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