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09/23/2005 05:26:03 PM |
*Critique Club Comment*
Please keep in mind that I am not a trained professional...
Composition
The composition has too many disparate elements that don't lend themselves to each other, the most obvious of which are the dog and the chains of the swing. As some of the other commentors have stated, the composition would have been enhanced had you cropped out the dog. The chains, while distracting with this crop, may have worked on with a portrait crop that excluded the pooch. A shot from straight on may have cured the chains but you would have lost the model's pose. I do like the model's pose and her facial expression, and she does have winning smile. Right hand placement is good, the left hand being cropped I find mildly distracting, but only in a "What's in her left hand" sort of way.
Technical Details
The focus on the model is good. I think that, had you been able to eliminate the background during post processing using curves or such, the use of the on-board flash would have worked for this shot. As it stands there seems to be too much PP to bring out detail, and with it noise, from the background. This may have also caused the slightly desaturated colors. Perhaps upping the color, at least of the shirt, may have made the photo pop a little more.
Aesthetics
I do not find this photo aesthically displeasing, but I would have to agree it has a candid snapshot feel to it. Cropping and highlighting the model may have been able to overcome this.
Relationship to Challenge
IMO this photo meets the challenge. A portrait is a photograph intended to show the basic appearance of a person and, perhaps, bring out a quality or essence of that person; this photo does that. I feel this is a relaxed, happy person.
Overall I think this photo is a nice representation of the model. Had the foreground and background been taken into account and either utilized better or eliminated completely, this photo would have done much better.
If you have questions or comments about my comments please feel free to PM me.
I look forward to seeing your next entry!
-jp
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 Photographer found comment helpful. |
Comments Made During the Challenge  |
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09/18/2005 11:08:10 AM |
| this photo needs more light it seems you tried pulling too much light in PS |
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09/16/2005 06:02:58 PM |
| you caught a wonderful expression, but the composition is odd. Maybe crop the dog out, just have chains and her with the background all the way to black with levels? The on board flash is always hard to get a nice photo with - hope that helps 3 |
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09/13/2005 11:59:17 PM |
| really not much more than a snapshot. many distracting features, dog, chains, cropping. She could be a good subject if you got a little more creative. Keep at it. |
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09/13/2005 11:09:48 PM |
| seems cloudy to me, sorry |
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09/13/2005 08:55:26 AM |
| Cute smile. I would have cropped closer to her face. The picture is a bit smokey to me. |
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09/13/2005 02:48:49 AM |
Underexposed and washed out. Looks a bit like a snapshot. Try avoid using the flash when shooting and although you've captured a nice moment here there're just too many distracting elements for me (the dog, the chains, the background). Hopefully you'll receive some more constructive critique and good luck for future shooting.
Alex |
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09/12/2005 11:07:53 PM |
| this is more of a snapshot than a portrait |
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| Photographer found comment helpful. |
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09/12/2005 10:11:32 PM |
chains reflect too much
... |
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09/12/2005 07:57:55 PM |
| I wonder if this would have greater impact if the dog was cropped out of the photo? Your model has a nice smile. |
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09/12/2005 04:37:43 PM |
| would have been even better if it had been more clear |
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| Photographer found comment helpful. |
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09/12/2005 03:10:51 PM |
| The chains are distracting, and this looks more like a snapshot than a portrait. If you wanted to include the dog, she should have sat behind him. It's hard to get a good shot like this at night. |
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| Photographer found comment helpful. |
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09/12/2005 03:06:00 AM |
| The harsh lighting (flash?) really takes away from such a great candid as this :( But props for it all the same. |
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| Photographer found comment helpful. |
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